I know the saying is “A problem shared…” and I know too that sometimes this isn’t the case. Sometimes sharing your problem just upsets the other party and now instead of just yourself, you’ve also got the problem of a worried-sick mother, or a partner who feels helpless, or a friend who nervously changes the subject, and so on.
But in the case of the peace that comes from knowing others understand and sympathise, it goes a long way towards propelling you through the trouble. A cloud can hang over a situation in our lives for months, or even years. We may have a long way yet to go to get through it. But each time someone genuinely reflects on the subject, or shares their similar experiences, it can be just that little nudge you need to get you through another week, or another day, or even another hour. These nudges along the way, whatever their stature, are fuel for the journey.
After commenting on some tweets from the Guardian Careers’ Twitter account, I was invited to share my experiences of being an unemployed mature graduate with a 1st class degree. Of being both “over-qualified” and “under-qualified”, according to employers.
The Guardian’s careers articles, Q&As, and series of guest posts are comforting and enlightening, and I highly recommend taking a look around their archives. Job hunting and its related soul searching can be a very solitary, lonely experience. Even if you have supportive loved ones around you, unless they’re in the same boat, it’s not always easy to relate. The self doubt, the what-ifs, the state of looking backwards so often you need a rear view mirror attached to your head. I often feel cut off from the rest of the world in this matter. So it’s refreshing to read about others’ experiences, some reflecting my own, some with different outcomes, but all insightful.
All of my friends save two are in stable jobs, some in very healthy career paths, so there are few people with whom I feel at ease discussing this topic. The truth is, there are hundreds of thousands of people out there unemployed, and thousands of mature graduates who’ve either been in my shoes, or are in them now. And really, I know I can talk to my friends about this topic, but my self-consciousness keeps me from dumping it all on them when there’s little they can say to make it better. It can be awkward to shine the light on the lopsidedness in friends’ situations, and I never want to make anyone uncomfortable. So it was with great relief I read the comments on my post today.
Simply put, there are some amazing, lovely, empathetic, intelligent, eloquent people out there who are either in a similar situation, or know a loved one who is or has been, or can simply just see the state of the job market and feel for those of us struggling to find a place in it. To all those lovely people, a massive hug and thanks. I want to add you all to my Twitter and Facebook and read your blogs and encourage you that while we may be in a rotten time for chasing dreams and wondering if there’s any value in doing so, I believe persistence is key. Don’t give up.
Knowing that we’ve had to work a lot harder to get somewhere we want to be, in the end–even if it takes years–we’ll appreciate it infinitely more than those who slid easily into jobs pre-2008. It sounds counter-intuitive, but I feel like whenever this recession starts to ease up, we’ll be able to put a big, fat bullet point on our CVs that reads DETERMINED and COMMITTED, skills honed not on the job but while seeking one. And determination on the job is much easier when you know there’s a paycheck coming, so those of us able to keep that determination alive in the mean time aren’t wasting time.
Thank you for reading! Your time and thoughts are valued!